The Personal MBA

Master the Art of Business

A world-class business education in a single volume. Learn the universal principles behind every successful business, then use these ideas to make more money, get more done, and have more fun in your life and work.

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What Is The 'Golden Trifecta'?

The Golden Trifecta is my way to make others feel important and safe when talking to me: Appreciation, Courtesy and Respect.

Appreciation means expressing your gratitude for what others are doing for you, even if it's not perfect.

Courtesy is, simply put, politeness.

Respect means honoring the other person's status.

It's important to apply The Golden Trifecta to all your interactions with people, not just the ones you're interested in.

Josh Kaufman Explains The 'Golden Trifecta'

If people have a fundamental need to feel Important and Safe, how do you go about doing that? The Golden Trifecta is my personal three-word summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People.

If you want to make others feel important and safe around you, always remember to treat people with appreciation, courtesy, and respect.

Appreciation means expressing your gratitude for what others are doing for you, even if it's not quite right.

Imagine that you're designing a product, and your lead designer shows you some mockups that you believe won't work.

Bluntly responding "This is totally wrong-do it again," is a good way to make your colleague feel unimportant and insecure.

Instead, express appreciation: "Thanks so much. It's clear you worked hard on this and I appreciate that. I'm not sure if we're there yet, but here are a few ideas that may help."

Same content, but delivered in a very different, and more effective, tone.

Courtesy is politeness, pure and simple.

I once heard courtesy defined as "accepting small inconveniences on behalf of another person," and I think that's a very useful definition. Opening the door for another person is a small inconvenience, but it can have a major impact on how they perceive you.

There's no need to make every petty issue a big deal.

Respect is a matter of honoring the other person's status.

No matter how you relate to the person you're communicating with, respecting them as an individual is critical if you want to make them feel important or safe, no matter how high or low their social status.

It's important to apply the Golden Trifecta to all of your interactions with other people, not just the people you're particularly interested in.

If you've ever had lunch or dinner with someone who was nice to you but rude to the wait staff, you know what I mean. Treating other people poorly sends a clear signal to everyone that you can't be trusted.

If you make it a policy to treat people with appreciation, courtesy and respect in all circumstances, other people will feel important and safe in your presence.

Questions About The 'Golden Trifecta'


"Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do."

Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People


From Chapter 8:

Working With Others


https://personalmba.com/golden-trifecta/



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The Personal MBA

Master the Art of Business

A world-class business education in a single volume. Learn the universal principles behind every successful business, then use these ideas to make more money, get more done, and have more fun in your life and work.

Buy the book:


About Josh Kaufman

Josh Kaufman is an acclaimed business, learning, and skill acquisition expert. He is the author of two international bestsellers: The Personal MBA and The First 20 Hours. Josh's research and writing have helped millions of people worldwide learn the fundamentals of modern business.

More about Josh Kaufman →